Today.

I cough myself smiling, and I was wondering why. After that I realised it was because I was thinking of you. I wonder why you are always on my mind. It's like you are stuck in my head and the only thing I can do is think of you. It's amazing how the only thing I think about it's you and me being together again.

I was pretty bored today, I didn't really do anything. Actually I didn't do anything at all. I stayed home since I had to do some homework. I still haven't finished them, and I can't understand why. I have all the information I need, but for some reason I just can't do the work. The only thing I do is listen over and over again the same song that reminds me of you, and wait for you to call me or text me. Am I just going mad? I really don't want to fall in love. I have bad experience with it. Last time I really liked someone I turned up getting really hurt, and to be honest, I don't really want that again.

So if I know I don't want to love you, why can't I just stop thinking of you? It's just amazing how I can't do anything than think of you. It gets really frustrating. I wanted to go out, think about other things, just try to forget about you for some time, but for some reason my parents didn't let me. I always say well everything happens for something, but I would really love to know why this.

All I've done this hole day was think of you then, think of you, after that, think of you. Let's make it shorter all I ever did was think of you. When you text me I always smile and answer, but this time I was actually really happy because you did it. It's getting on my nerves, I really want to do something about it but I can't. For some reason I can't do anything at all.

I guess I'll go and watch some T.V. think about everything, and maybe if you do really care, you'll text, or even call. Just so you know I don't want to love you because I'm afraid that something bad will happen. I mean, in other words, I'm afraid I will get hurt, even though when I'm with you, I feel really happy and I feel like nothing bad can happen, there is always a side that tells you no. But remember after all I love you. You are the reason I wake up and smile. (: